Hottest Turtle Sex Video Ever

If you’ve never seen a turtle hump a high-top shoe, then boy are you in for a treat. Note that there is a visible turtle penis in this video, so if that kind of thing scares you or disturbs your delicate sensibilities, kill yourself. (Via deleteyourself)

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Google Street View Catches Awesome Pictures

Caught on Camera — The Best of Google Street View

Street View is a feature on Google Maps that allows you to virtually roam the streets of towns to which you may never have even been. While this is useful for figuring directions, it’s also turned out to be useful for finding amazing pictures of people doing stuff they should not be doing.

History is a Perpetual Virgin

History is a perpetual virgin endlessly and repeatedly deflowered by successive generations of fucking liars

– Adam McEwen

The Wanky Shit Demon

This is completely NSFW, but it’s hysterical. In a very scatological junior high “guys are gross and find stupid things funny” kind of way. But it’s genius. (Via RatherGood)

Van Fuckin Halen

Van Fuckin Halen - Diamond Dave Edition: Assteroidz v1.0

You know the console wars? PS3, XBOX360, Wii, blah, blah? All goes back to those guys being unable to sign Van Fuckin Halen and make this game.

Stunning World Builder Video

“A strange man builds a world using holographic tools for the woman he loves.” This really is a severely cool video and concept, that is extraordinarily well executed. If you don’t watch it, it will be like kicking the creator in the balls. You don’t want to be that guy.

This award winning short was created by filmmaker Bruce Branit, widely known as the co-creator of ‘405‘. World Builder was shot in a single day followed by about 2 years of post production. Branit is the owner of Branit VFX based in Kansas City.

I’m Going To Be Just Like Mommy: A Stripper

When I Grow Up...I Want to be Like Mommy
A letter sent to school after a girl drew picture of what her mother did for a living. Apparently that is not a drawing of this kid’s mother rubbing her cooter on a pole for money, but instead of her finding the last shovel in the “back room” at Home Depot where Mommy works. Right. The back room. Almost fooled us. (Via Buzz Newsroom)

Adding Corn Starch to a Speaker is Awesome

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Add some corn starch mix to a speaker you are willing to ruin, run some deep bass through that sucker, and watch the cool stuff that happens. It’s like nerd magic. +1 HP -20 MANA

Drill Sergeant Joe B. Fricks Rules For A Gunfight

02. Anything worth shooting is worth shooting twice…

10. Someday someone may kill you with your own gun, but they should have to beat you to death with it because it is empty.

11. Stretch the rules. Always win. The only unfair fight is the one you lose.

Drill Sergeant Joe B. Fricks - Petzal: The Rules of Gunfighting

Carnival, The Big Picture

Carnival: The Queen of the Drums

And I mean big. Hootermongous. Get it? Because she has big boobs. And feathers. At Carnival. Which is a festival. Of boobs. Or so these pictures from The Big Picture over at lead me to believe (via The Big Picture, which is an absolutely awesome thing to have in your RSS…great pictures of just about everything stunning…not just chesticles).